Sunday, November 22, 2009

There Won't Be Trumpets



"There won't be trumpets or bolts of fire
To say he's coming.
No Roman candles, no angels' choir,
No sound of distant drumming.
He may not be the cavalier,
Tall and graceful, fair and strong.
Doesn't matter, just as long as he comes along!"
Stephen Sondheim
 
DAY 44:  I am grateful that I haven't given up on a relationship.  It would be nice to have a partner to share my life with, but my life is pretty complete even without one - I'm not desperate, nor have I lost hope.  It does get particularly difficult around the holidays and I'm steeling myself a little for the next month or so.  I still believe there's a perfect person out there for me. 

As I mentioned in an earlier post, it's been a rocky and unlucky year in the dating department.  By all rights, I should've said "to hell with them all" quite some time ago.  I've met a bunch of potential suitors since this time last year and have had WAY too many first dates, mostly through online dating services and a couple through friend set-ups or suggestions.  None of them have worked out, and many times the poor choice and final decision has been mine.  Either they lived hours away, aren't open to their family (which has become a real deal-breaker), were noncommunicative or unavailable, or we just simply didn't have much to talk about or in common.  As I've said before, I know the common factor in all of these "failures" is me, but I do learn a little more about myself and what I'm looking for with each attempt.

But I still keep trying ... 

I'll be the first to admit that one of my biggest fears is that I'll grow old and die alone ... so I'll keep looking (although everyone always tells me that I'll find that person when I least expect it and when I STOP looking). 

I still believe in love ... and I'm grateful that I still have hope.

2 comments:

  1. We so need to get together and talk. I'm glad you still have hope. I've lost it.

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  2. Having high standards and high hopes is a GOOD combination, I think.

    BTW - Good luck EVER really being alone. Your friends would never allow it!

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